walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
