New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize