I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
