i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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