TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Randomize
