she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
