great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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