He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
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