just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
