we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
