Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
