East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
nutella sex= disaster
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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