I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize
