Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
