What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
