lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
