Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
