I look better un-naked...
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
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