btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
