Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Even my vagina gasped.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
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