i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
