the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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