did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
