This girl is more easily done than said...
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
