holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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