Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
