i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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