maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
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So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
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