She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
