You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
