But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Randomize
