she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
i drank out of a bidet.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
