He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Randomize
