she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
