trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
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