Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
