Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
