i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Randomize
