i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
