Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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