I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
