Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Randomize
