tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
