Fine. I'll sleep in my office
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize