that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
