I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
