my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
