I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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