Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
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