ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
